Seven months!

Good grief, I can't believe I haven't written to you for seven months! Do you think it is because you have been behaving yourself? Well, hardly. Although the headline figures look good they're hiding all the ups and downs you've been putting me through. It seems every time I decide to get off my behind and start doing regular exercise it really wakes you up and just the mention of insulin sets my levels plummeting! A few weeks ago I had 25 hypos in a fortnight and my 14-day average on my meter was 5.0 mmol/l! And that's including all my post-meal readings too! Now that I've had a few days off to try and get my levels back to somewhere reasonable my 7 day average has shot up to 7.7! I even had a 13.3 last night and had to give a correction! Why can't you just use the insulin you need and then pee the rest away?

Anyway, I'm off to meet loads of people tomorrow who know you pretty well and don't be surprised if we all thumb our noses in unison  - yes, we'll be doing it to YOU!!!!

Gah! Seven hypos in two days! You're having a laugh! You just don't know how to deal with a little increase in physical activity, do you? I've been dropping the insulin like a hot rock over the past three days and you're still complaining that it's too much! I've been guzzling jelly babies and ginger cake all day - what's the point of exercising if you have to eat all that stuff afterwards? Tut!

Where did that 14.0 come from? Lull me into a false sense of being right within range all day, then casually toss in one of my highest levels for weeks, with absolutely no explanation? Thought you'd hang back until all the insulin had worked its way out then hit me with it, eh? One of these days I'll be able to monitor you all the time and you won't be able to do things like that to me, so make the most of it whilst you can!

Did you think I'd forgotten about you? Unlikely, I'd say, given your constant demands! You really didn't like December did you? All that cold and snow and not being able to go out running or keep warm and all that comfort food and all those horrible dark nights and gloomy, depressing days! I'm guessing that's why you're demanding twice as much insulin these days? Well, enjoy it whilst it lasts, those levels are going to be coming down pretty soon. Now that the days are getting longer I've got much more motivation and getting out there running and stuff! Your double-figure days are numbered, lantus-wise, and I'm expecting to be getting through a few jelly babies to as you get used to the fact that you don't need anywhere near as much insulin! You'll see!

You really do put up a fight in the mornings, don't you? Six units for 12g carbs yesterday, and it still wasn't quite enough to get you under control! One unit for two grams carbs! And yet you go all meek and submissive later - one unit for eight grams! That's 75% less! And you're practically AWOL in the evenings - one unit for twelve grams! How can this be? Do I have 'morning diabetes' or something? Do you get bored as the day goes on? How would it be if I stayed in bed until the afternoon? Might have to test you out one lazy day...

Well, you seem to be happy enough on that lantus dose, but you took your time deciding! You've got me all jittery at night though, after those hypos - now if I wake I HAVE to test just to make sure I'm going to survive the night! Last night was really annoying - I bet you knew that my bedside meter's batteries were running low, didn't you? All that messing about getting up and going downstairs to get the other meter, and then I was 5.0...hahaha! Most amusing, I don't think!

Now, what's all this business with needing lots more insulin for breakfast than any other time of the day? How come I can have one slice of toast in the morning and need 6 or 7 units, but by lunchtime I can eat three times as much for practically the same dose? How come you're so resistant to insulin in the morning? Or is my liver always particularly active at that time? How am I supposed to know? I don't suppose it really matters, but when you have me convinced that I need lower doses for all my meals EXCEPT breakfast it's very confusing and unfair of you.

It seems that we are reading from different editions of the blood sugar management book, am I right? Or yours is in some kind of language that you;ve not quite got the hang of yet? Look, this is how it's supposed to go: I cut back on the lantus, I eat toast and jam before bed, you behave. Simple, straightforward, where's the difficulty? Why then, did I wake again and test at 2.7 mmol/l? I'm waiting...! No answer eh? Gone all sheepish? You think I don't know what you're up to , don't you? You've been hanging around my pancreas like a lovesick puppy, stimulating those beta cells to somehow start up again whilst I sleep!

Ha! I got you last night though, didn't I? You just can't overcome peanut butter sandwiches can you? Especially when I team it up with another lantus reduction! That 4.4 at 3:30am was a bit feeble - all that lovely fat slowed the glucose right down and spread it way beyond my liver low! I must admit though, you've still got me a bit jittery about tonight. I've been reducing my meal boluses right back, and I'm still only at 4.7 before bed. Might have made a bit of a mistake with the jam on toast, but I wanted something sweet and I'm starting to get a bit tired of peanuts. We'll see...